Upwards Church

Living a life that is honoring to God in the middle of a sin-oriented culture is a challenge. How can we resist temptation? I don’t think there’s a single answer. But I do believe there are five practical keys to avoiding damaging behaviors.

1.    Recognize dangerous habits.

Do you channel surf or internet surf late at night? Do you walk down the candy aisle at the supermarket when you’re struggling to rein in your appetite? Do you rush to get the mail, hoping to see the Victoria’s Secret catalog before your wife does? Do you regularly hang out with people who make light of your desire to grow in Christ, who dismiss you as a prude? Be honest with yourself and, if necessary, with someone else about the ways you flirt with temptation. For some of us, that will mean taking a closer look at the way media and entertainment choices expose us to temptation. We may also need to look carefully at how certain relationships influence us. Seemingly innocent and small decisions can affect our lives significantly.

We also need to recognize that we are particularly exposed to temptation when we’re out of our normal life rhythms. For example, traveling, illness, and working overtime can leave us more vulnerable to temptation. We must make plans in advance to protect ourselves during these vulnerable times.

2.    Be accountable.

If you’re struggling to resist temptation, share your struggle with others. This is why Growth Groups are so vital.  “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective” (James 5:16). When we choose to be accountable, we’re making a commitment to tell others the truth about our struggles and then healing begins. We have to be honest about our sin before we can begin to battle it effectively.

3.    Transform my thinking.

If we hope to resist temptation consistently, we must replace worldly thinking with God’s thoughts, found in His Word. His ideas of right and wrong, His promises, and His teaching must saturate our souls. Romans 12:1–2 says,

Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Regular exposure to truth is the only thing that—with the power of the Holy Spirit—has the capacity to combat the alluring lies of our culture about what will really satisfy us.  Take time regularly to get into God’s word.

4.    Exercise self-discipline.

Self-control in other areas of life will help us resist temptation. We may need to examine our sleep, eating, work, and entertainment habits. If major areas of our lives are out of control, sin becomes a more attractive option. Disciplines such as silence and fasting can help us bring our appetites under control.   Paul recognized the need to control his body and discipline himself for the sake of righteousness. “I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize” (1 Cor. 9:27).

5.    Rely on God’s faithfulness.

God promises that we will never face a temptation we cannot resist:

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. —1 Cor. 10:13

This important promise undercuts any tendency to rationalize our sin by saying, “That’s just the way I am.” God has promised strength to be obedient. Too often we surrender to the first whisper of temptation instead of relying upon the strength God has provided to resist it.

Darrell

www.RidgeFellowship.com

Source: adapted from an article in Discipleship Journal

Have you ever said something you regretted?  Who hasn’t   The old saying, “sticks and stones may break your bones but words can never hurt you” just isn’t true. Words do hurt, badly.

Ephesians chapter 4 has very practical things to say about our words. Paul focuses on the believer’s speech in terms of its truth, its tone, and its motivation.

Damaging Words

The bible emphasizes that certain words must be cut from our vocabulary as followers of Christ: “Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouths…” Ephesians 4:29a (NKJV). Corrupt is literally what is rotten, putrid or worthless.  Applied to language and relationships, it points to words that spoil relationships, poison another’s influence, or corrupt another’s character.

How often do we verbally poison those to whom we would not think of giving a toxic substance? Consider the poison of negativity, in the forms of sarcasm or complaining.  How subtly parents poison their children’s confidence and imaginations by being negative or critical.  How effectively employers spoil employees’ creativity by meeting every new idea with, “That won’t work here!”

But probably the most common form of evil talk is trading gossip. When our words soil someone else’s reputation or worth, or when our stories attract attention to others’ failures and weaknesses, we’re slandering a person made in the image of God.  We’ve stooped to new level of low.

But no matter what form bad mouthing takes, Paul makes it clear that God’s children are meant for better things. He then spells out four characteristics of a Christ follower’s words:

Good Words

The defining feature of a believer’s words is that they are good words. Only conversation that has the quality of goodness is appropriate for God’s children. Here’s a useful test to apply before we speak: Is what I’m about to say truly good? As an old Quaker used to say, “Never break the silence unless you can improve on it.”  My mom used to say, “If you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all.”  Here’s how to speak good words:

• Be Constructive   “…only what is useful for building up…” Ephesians 4:29 b (NRSV)

According to Paul, our words as believers are not only good, they are good for something:

“good for building up,” or “good for improvement.”

Each of us knows instantly when someone’s comments are constructive or not. Often it depends not so much on what is said as the way it is spoken.

• Be Appropriate   “…as fits the occasion…” Ephesians 4:29 c (ESV)

It is possible to offer good words, even constructive words, which are not helpful for the needs of the moment.

Knowing just what to say, and just how to say it, is never easy, but is our goal. As today’s gospel on legs, God’s voice to our generation, we must recognize how crucial the timing of our words.  A word of thanks at the right time is better than after the fact. Standing up for a friend who is being put down is better at the time than a week later.

In relationships the issue is never to communicate or not to communicate, but always what kind of communication to offer.  Something is going to be heard, and it may be false and distorted inferences.  What is needed most in difficult circumstances such as loss is not talk but a warm touch. An appropriate hug or touch can be powerful to those who are afraid or brokenhearted. In some situations the most eloquent words are not words at all, but rather the simple power of your presence.

• Be Gracious    “…that it may give grace to those who hear. “ Ephesians 4:29 d (ESV)

Grace is the unearned favor of God. Words that “impart grace to those who hear,” are words that are concerned not with what others deserve or have a right to, but with what others need. Grace-talk takes many forms.  The category of gracious words has less to do with vocabulary lists than with attitudes of the heart.

In America we have a lawyer for every 350 people which makes us the most litigious society on earth. In such an atmosphere gracious words may seem like the language of wimps.

But grace-talk is not the language of wimps, but of winners. The notion that in relationships victory goes to those who demand their rights, is not true.

The human personality, as Sidney Harris has pointed out, it is not an apple that has to be polished, but a banana that has to be peeled. And the reason we remain so far from one another, the reason we neither communicate nor interact in any real way, is that most of us spend our lives in polishing rather than peeling. We shine the surface: appearance, clothes, manners, charisma. Our focus is on selling the package, not the product. It takes courage and strength to love, to risk, to be vulnerable to the peeling process of authentic self-disclosure and discovery. In today’s culture, the wimp is the relational Scrooge who is too afraid to risk.

That is why perhaps the greatest form of grace-talk we may practice today is the simple phrase, “Will you forgive me?” Built into this almost miraculous formula is grace as a gift of forgiveness that is beyond our human capabilities, plus an awareness of the shared ground for all forgiving: the undeserved forgiveness we have received.

Gracious words are concerned with words as gifts, not payments. Grace-talk is the Christian’s way of spreading around God’s undeserved gift of forgiveness.

Instead of using our words to damage our words can bring light and truth to the dark world around us. As believers, we can create a counter-revolution with words that are good, that are constructive, that are appropriate and timely, and that bring unearned joy to the hearers.

Darrell

www.ridgefellowship.com

Source: Adapted from an article in Discipleship Journal, by JERRY HARVILL who teaches speech communication at the University of Kentucky in Lexington, Kentucky.

Are you living damaged?  I have found that my damaging actions are a result of wrong thoughts.

The Bible leaves no doubt that our lives are the product of our thoughts. Proverbs 23:7 declares, “For as he thinks within himself, so he is.”  Garbage In, Garbage Out is the modern counterpart.  Just as a computer’s output is dependent on the information that is input, so our actions are the result of our thinking.

• “Sow a thought, reap an action.
• Sow an action, reap a habit.
• Sow a habit, reap a character. ‘
• Sow a character, reap a destiny!”

If we do not want to damage our destiny, our character or have damaging habits, it all begins with our thoughts.  We must realize that thoughts are real and powerful.  We must bring “every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ” (2 Cor. 10:5).

Once you give yourself to Christ you become a new creation.  (2 Cor. 5:17)  You are to focus your thoughts upon the good things of life and upon God. What we think is so important that God tells us what we are to think.

Philippians 4 spells out in detail the things we must think about as believers:

Whatever is true. Truth includes facts and statements that are in accordance with reality (not lies, rumors, or embellishments); and sincere (not deceitful or with evil motives). Truth is a characteristic of God (Romans 3:4).

Dr. Walter Cavert reported a survey on worry that indicated that only 8 percent of the things people worried about were legitimate matters of concern! The other 92 percent were imaginary, never happened, or involved matters over which the people had no control anyway. Satan is the liar (John 8:44), and he wants to corrupt our minds with his lies (2 Cor. 11:3). “Did God really say that?” is the way he approaches us, just as he approached Eve (Gen. 3:1ff). The Holy Spirit controls our minds through truth (John 17:17; 1 John 5:6), but the devil tries to control them through lies. Whenever we believe a lie, Satan is in control!

Whatever is honest and just. This means “worthy of respect and right.” There are many things that are not respectable, and followers of Christ should not think about these things. This does not mean we hide our heads in the sand and avoid what is unpleasant and displeasing, but it does mean we do not focus our attention on dishonorable things and permit them to control our thoughts.

Whatever is pure, lovely, and of good report. “Pure” refers to moral purity, since we are constantly attacked by temptations to sexual impurity (Eph. 4:17-24; 5:8-12). “Lovely” means “beautiful, attractive.” “Of good report” means “worth talking about, appealing.” The believer must major on the godly thoughts, not the sinful thoughts of a corrupt world.

Whatever possesses virtue and praise. If it has virtue, it will motivate us to do better; and if it has praise, it is worth commending to others.  No Christ follower can afford to waste “mind power” on thoughts that tear him down or that would tear others down if these thoughts were shared.

Do you have problems with impure thoughts? Examine what you are putting into your mind through television, books, music, conversations, movies, and magazines. Replace harmful input with healthy material.  Above all, read God’s Word, pray and stay connected in church (worship and Growth Group involvement). Ask God to help you focus your mind on what is good and pure. It can be done.

“Lord help us not think damaging thoughts but to think about the things you would have us think about; thoughts that true, honorable, right, pure, lovely and admirable.  Amen”

Darrell

www.ridgefellowship.com

Sources:

— Bible Exposition Commentary (BE Series) – New Testament

— Life Application Bible Commentary

— MacArthur New Testament Commentary, The

— Preacher’s Outline and Sermon Bible – Commentary