Thinking That’s Different

Posted on April 28, 2016 by dkoop

Dare to Be DifferntOne of my biggest struggles in life is worrying about what other people think.  I have a disease called, “the need to please.”  Do you have this struggle? This is especially true when it comes to following Christ.  I want to make other people happy. I don’t want them to think I’m different. I want them to like me and I want to blend in. Whenever I feel like God is leading me to do something, the very first thought that drops into my mind is, “What are the people going to think? How will this affect others and my relationships?  Are they going to understand?

A verse that helps me a lot is Proverbs 29:25, “Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.

The Hebrew word means a trap, a snare or a hook that was put into an animal’s nose.  I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a bull that has a ring in their nose. With just a small ring and a small rope a 200 pound man can lead a 2000 pound bull where ever he wants.  Fear of what people think will prove to be like a hook in your nose and lead you away from what God wants.

God might lead you to watch much less TV because it takes up so much time and it robs you from time with your family.  Just as decide to do this; you are going to wonder, “What are people going to think if I don’t watch TV,” and “I don’t know what’s going on with the Kardashians?

Or you might say, “I believe God is leading us to be a foster parent.” And you’ve already got three kids and you’re wondering, “Well, what’s my mom going to think?” and “What’s my in-laws going to think?”

God may be leading you to give more financially to his work.  Then you wonder, ‘what will my family think?  Will they think I’m crazy?”

What is God leading you to do, but you are afraid of?

We may not do what God is leading us to do because we’re afraid of what people are going to think.

Here’s what has hit me like a ton of bricks, becoming obsessed with what people think about me is the quickest way to forget what God thinks about me.   Or said another way, living to please people is a barrier to living to please God.  People didn’t die on a cross for me, forgive me, cleanse me, give me peace, joy and purpose, Jesus did.

I have to continually deal with the inward struggle of the need to please people.  “Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.”  

Another struggle is that when I do step out to follow Christ, then comes the criticism!  When I face criticism, I begin to think, “What if they are right?” How do you handle criticism?   I’ve learned that when I follow Christ and start living differently people will notice.

These are things I’ve heard through the years.  You may hear them too,

“Hey, what’s up with you? What are you doing going to church all of the time!”  “Why are you going to a group meeting again? Why are you giving money to church? That’s stupid!”

“Why are you going to serve the homeless or help the needy or go on a mission trip? You are wasting your time!”

“Hey, why don’t you go to the strip club or party with us? What are you, Mr. Goody Two Shoes?”

“Come on, we used to smoke weed together or get drunk! Come back! Oh I get it, you think you’re better than us, you’re Mr. Holier Than Thou!”

When they make fun of us and criticize us and even persecute you, remember the words of Jesus, John 15:18-19. He said:

“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.”

Receiving criticism is a part of being different; it’s a part of following Christ. It’s a part of leaving the normal road that leads to destruction and getting on the narrow road that leads to life.  Those on the normal path don’t like when you do something different.

Here’s what I try to remember, I don’t want to worry too much when people criticize me for being different.  I want to worry when they don’t! Because if they don’t, chances are I’m too much like the world.  If no one makes fun of you for the way you follow Christ, you may be blending in and traveling with the crowd.

Last thought, I can’t please everyone, but I can please God.

No matter what I do, I will not please everyone, so I should stop trying.  But I can please God and that’s what matters most.

Darrell

For more about the series, Dare to Be Different, go to www.RidgeFellowship.com

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Self Control That’s Different

Posted on April 26, 2016 by dkoop

Dare to Be DifferntWe live in an instant gratification generation.  We want what we want and we want it now!  It’s normal to give in to our cravings.

I love ice cream, and if it’s in the freezer, I know that it’s for dessert, but I want it and I want it now! And so, I eat it.   I do the same with cookies and pie. I lose control with sweets.

How normal is it for a boyfriend and a girlfriend to be doing things that the bible says are for marriage? But they don’t care, they want it and they want it now!

How normal is it to want something we can’t afford, but we want it and we want it now so we charge it!?

A lack of self-control gets dangerous when we are willing to trade something great in our future for something easy now.

There’s a story that illustrates this better than any other in the Bible, about two brothers, brothers Esau and Jacob. Esau was the older brother and he was a man’s man. Jacob was the younger brother and he was a momma’s boy.  In Biblical times the oldest son would have what was known as the birthright.  Since he was born first, he had a tremendous advantage. Upon his father’s death, Esau would get two thirds of the inheritance.  He would rise into the position of power, like the executor of the estate.

So, one day when Esau was out on a hunting trip, he came home hungry. Momma’s boy Jacob, was in the kitchen making some stew. Jacob tricked his older brother into giving him his birthright. Here’s the literal story from Genesis 25: 29-32:

Once when Jacob was cooking some stew, Esau came in from the open country famished… The older brother comes in, ‘I’m hungry!’  He said to Jacob, ‘Quick, let me have some of your red stew, I’m famished!’ Jacob, the younger brother, he replies, ‘Hey, hang on a second! First, sell me your birthright!’   Esau the older brother, he says “Look, I’m about to die!”

Let’s stop here. Do you think he was about to die? No, he could have lived off of his own fat for at least three hours, or three days, he wasn’t about to die! But at the moment, he feels like he is.

And then he asked this question that seemed so ridiculous.  Esau said: “What good is the birthright to me?”

‘I’m so hungry; I really desire that bowl of stew! What good is this birthright to me?’

Then Esau, the older brother, does something that we would all say is so foolish. How in the world could anyone be so short-sided, so foolish? He traded his birthright.  The blessing, position, prestige and wealth: an amazing future for stupid bowl of stew?

Sadly, its normal for people to do this all the time.  Every day, people are silly enough to trade a great future for an immediate desire.

I’m sure you know someone who derailed their life with a desire that went unchecked and unmanaged. What happened? They locked in on this desire, and they forgot about everything else that mattered, because at that moment the bowl of stew was so important.

It could be a young girl who just feels like, “The clothes I get, they make me happy.” She gets a belt to go with the shoes that matches the hair clip that she got and then she buys more and more and sinks into debt and wakes up one day in $37,000 of credit card debt. And she wonders, “How in the world did I get here?” One bowl of stew at a time.

It could be the man that really loves his wife, loves his children, loves his God, but he meets someone at work, they flirt, they have lunch and he lusts for her.  In that moment, he focuses in on the stew and he forgets about his love for his wife, kids and his God.  He trades the ultimate: family, love, trust and commitment, for the immediate: an affair, just a silly as a bowl of stew.

It could be the young girl, she really wants a godly husband and she really wants to be loved and she wants to love. She meets a guy, and he’s a pretty good guy, and she says, “I love you” to him and he says “I love you” to her and then he says, “but if you really love me you would.”  And she doesn’t want to because she wants to try to please God, but she really wants to be loved and so she does. She trades the ultimate: virginity, purity, a gift that can only be given once for the immediate, a boyfriend’s supposed love. He dumps her and she feels cheap and used because she traded something that mattered for a silly bowl of stew.

It could be a man that really loves his family. He wants to be a good dad and says, “I’m going to love my family by being a great provider.” So, what do he do? Works late, overtime, weekends and says, “I’m going to give them more than I had!”  He works hard rises on the ladder, makes more to get his family a bigger house and nicer cars. And then, one day he wakes up and his children are 24 and 27 and he realizes he doesn’t know his kids and they don’t know him!  What happened? He traded the ultimate, family and relationships for accomplishments and stuff!  A silly bowl of stew.

Who would be so dumb to trade their birthright for a bowl of stew? You could. That’s what I want to ask you, and I pray that you would be honest enough to be truthful and search your heart.

What’s your bowl of stew?

What is your desire or desires, that if left unchecked and unmanaged out from the direction of the Holy Spirit, could take you into a place where you literally short circuit God’s long term plan for something as simple as a bowl of stew.

It’s normal to want what we want now not later, and we’re willing to trade the ultimate for the immediate.

How can we be different?

I love what Paul writes in Galatians 5:16-17,

So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves. 17 The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires.

The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And what does the Spirit do? He gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires.

If your seeking nothing but your silly bowl of stew. Throw that thing down, call it what it is, it’s a bowl of stew. Seek God, open up His word, become passionate about Him, about His kingdom, and He will change you and mold your heart and give you His desires.  His desires become your desires because you desire what He desires, He will give you the desires of your heart. You will have less desire for only the temporary things of this world, because He’s transforming you. You’ll be different!  You’re not living for what everyone else lives.

Paul goes on to list in Galatians 5:22 the fruit of the spirit or what our lives produce as we live for God, ”The fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and SELF CONTROL.” 

This is so powerful. When the Holy Spirit changes your heart, rather than wanting more things of this world you start desiring to be generous and to forgive, and to bless people, love people and to go the extra mile, to be kind, to worship God, and to do all of these things that normal people don’t do, because God is changing your desires. The challenge is that as you grow closer to God; your stupid bowl of stew will pop up somewhere and if you’re not prepared, you may compromise all of the blessings of what God wants to give you in the future, for a temporary meaningless bowl of stew, which is exactly what Esau did.

Think about this, what have the scriptures and the people of God been saying for thousands of years? “We serve the God of Abraham, Issac, and Jacob.” Who was Jacob? The younger brother. Who should it have been? Who would it have been? Who could it have been if he hadn’t been so short-sided, that he traded his birthright for a bowl of stew? If he had of done what’s right, we would have said to this day, “We serve the God of Abraham, Issac, and Esau.” But, because of unchecked desires, Esau traded the ultimate for a stupid bowl of stew.

Who would do that?  I could, you could.  I want to be different and have self-control that’s different.  I’m going to follow Jesus, seek Him, and live for a greater future.  I hope you will join me.

Darrell

For more about Dare to Be Different, go to www.RidgeFellowship.com

 

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Forgiveness That’s Different

Posted on April 23, 2016 by dkoop

Dare to Be DifferntIn what ways do you try to be on good terms with God?  I used to think, “If I go to church, if I’m a good person, if I try really hard, God will be happy with me. If I make a mistake, hopefully my good may outweigh the bad.”  For me it was about how I performed, which is what religion is all about.  Thankfully I discovered something way different and much better!  Today, I would like to share this with you.  I’ll start with the normal view of trying to be right with God, and then I’ll share a Different view of forgiveness from God. Let’s start with normal.

Religion is our normal attempt to reach God.

Every world religion has its own set of external, man-made, religious rules of trying to please God. What is religion? It says, “If we behave this way, if we believe this way, if we do these things and not these things, then we can perform our way to God.”

Pick your rules. Yours might be, “I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, and I don’t chew, and I don’t run with girls who do! Therefore, I must be right with God!”

Or it could be, “I pray this way and kneel in this direction,” or “I go to church on this day,” or “I was baptized this way,” or “I don’t see this type of movies,” or “I do these religious behaviors.” And religion is externally focused, it’s if I behave the right way, then I might please God.

The problem with religion is that it always leads to one of two destinations, pride or despair.

I bet you know some prideful, holier than thou religious jerk?  They would say, “I’m right, you’re wrong. I do it right, you do it wrong. I have these beliefs and you don’t.”

Unfortunately, I have been this way.  While in seminary, learning the bible, the Greek and Hebrew I became prideful. I thought I should only listen to Christian music, avoid rated R movies and look down on others who did live in this way.  I was so prideful that when I met Niki and she listened to country music, I didn’t think I should date her.  How stupid I was!

Religion, also leads to despair.  You think, “I’m not good enough. Other people get it right, but not me! I can’t even make it to church two weeks in a row. I’m not supposed to say a bad word, but every time I get in rush hour traffic in Austin, I let them fly! I tried to pray, I can’t even pray for 30 seconds and my mind wanders. I’m an ADD prayer. I’m obviously not good enough.” Despair.

When I was younger, I lived in despair.  I often felt unworthy or ashamed.  I lived in guilt from the things I thought and did.  I couldn’t seem to do things right or measure up to others or the standards I had set in my own mind.

And that’s what religion does, it makes your proud or it makes you feel in despair. And that is man’s normal approach to God.

I want to share something very Different.  It’s not religion, but it is Jesus the Christ.

Christ is God’s Different way to reach us.

The Apostle Paul contrasted religion verses something revolutionary, a relationship with Jesus Christ.

In Philippians 3: 4-6, he offered his own religious resume, and it was spotless. He said:

4  though I could have confidence in my own effort if anyone could. Indeed, if others have reason for confidence in their own efforts, I have even more!  5 I was circumcised when I was eight days old. I am a pure-blooded citizen of Israel and a member of the tribe of Benjamin—a real Hebrew if there ever was one! I was a member of the Pharisees, who demand the strictest obedience to the Jewish law. 6  I was so zealous that I harshly persecuted the church. And as for righteousness, I obeyed the law without fault.  Philippians 3:3-6

“What does all of that mean?” He was saying, ‘I was raised by the best, in the best religious lineage, with the best religious education, mentored by the best; and followed the best religious behavior.’

Translated to our world today, what he was saying is:

“I was born in a seminary presidents home, tutored by nuns.  I went to a Christian school, graduated at the top of a Bible school. I only listen to K-love Christian radio. I was baptized by Billy Graham in the Jordan River, with the Pope doing things with his hands nearby.

Paul’s saying,I did it all! You can’t get more religious than what I did. I had it all.   The he says something surprising in verse 7:

7  I once thought these things were valuable, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done Philippians 3:7

What? All that religion is worthless?  And now he’s about to say the most Different thing ever:

8 Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. Philippians 3:8a

.. He just switched gears. I’m not talking religion. I’m talking about a relationship with the Son of God.

…For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ. Philippians 3:8b

Now, what I’m about to tell you is going to be shocking.  The Greek word translated as rubbish is the word, skubala.

Rubbish is a wuss way to translate skubala, it realy is. It can be translated as “rubbish” or “garbage.” But what it really is, “it’s human or animal waste”.  The King James translates it accurately as “dung” but it’s not really dung in the English language. The English equivalent for the word skubala is a bad word or a cuss word. There could be a bumper sticker that says, “Skubala Happens!”  All of this outward effort at religion, I call it skubala.

For a lot of people, they say, “I’ve got my religious beliefs. They’re neat, they’re organized!” Basically, what you have is a very organized pile of skubala.

Some would say, “I’ve got more religion than others.”  I’m not so sure that’s a good thing, you just have a bigger pile!

Have you met someone that is so proud of their pile they put a little flag in it?  It’s little flag in their pile to distinguish it from other piles. For some it’s a Baptist flag, a Pentecostal flag or a Methodist flag. They’re proud of their pile but it’s still a pile!

I know some people who claim to be more creative than others and make their own pile!  They pick a little bit of Christianity, a little bit of Buddhism, a little bit of New Age and mix it all together. They say, “I’ve got my own religion!” Great! It’s a pile of combined poop!

Here’s the deal; take your pile, whatever it is, you can put sprinkles on it, you can baptize it, you can bronze it, it’s still a pile!  That’s what religion is, it’s our external attempt to please God. And Paul says, it’s a pile of skubala.

Then he goes on to say this, he just calls it what it is:

“I consider all of this skubala, that I may gain Christ.” Philippians 3:8b

Not gain religion, gain Christ…  Now, don’t miss this:

I no longer count on my own righteousness through obeying the law; rather, I become righteous through faith in Christ. For God’s way of making us right with himself depends on faith. Philippians 3:9

Being right with God through faith?!   Being right with God through Christ?!  What he just said turned the religious world from which he came upside down. They’d say, ‘That’s heresy, you can’t say that, that’s Different!”

You want to know the purpose of the law? The purpose of all the rules is to show you, you don’t measure up. You’re not good enough and you never will be. If you’re ever bored wonder, “Do I measure up?” Just go take a quiz on theTen Commandments and ask yourself; Have I ever put anything ahead of God? Commandment 1, I have. Have I ever told a lie? Yes. Have I ever stolen anything? Yes.  What does that make me? A lying, thieving, idolater!  Don’t you feel better about yourself?

But thankfully, there is another righteousness, and this is really Different!. Being right with God is about faith in Christ and Him alone. Not religion.

  • Religion says it’s about what I do. God says it’s about what Christ did
  • Religion said that if I work really hard he might love me; God says that because He loves you, you work really hard because he does love you.
  • Religion says it’s about me; God says it’s about Christ.

I believe that and I have not been the same!  Good bye despair, I don’t have to measure up.  Good bye pride, it’s not about me.  If you want to be on good terms with God and receive forgiveness, hope, peace, joy and eternal security.  Place your faith in Christ and not in religion. Then you’ll be different!

Darrell

www.RidgeFellowship.com

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Dare to Be Different

Posted on April 22, 2016 by dkoop

Dare to Be Differnt

When I look back to the first significant portion of my life, I was driven to be like everyone else; especially those I thought were cool or popular.  If you looked at the way I lived, I was really striving to try to fit in, to try to be like other people. If you would have called me different, that would have been an insult, because I didn’t want to be different.  And so, I did what normal people did, lived how normal people live, and I ended up where normal people end up, which was in the middle of a life that was really hurting.  When I was sixteen years old I had the courage to do something that was different, because normal was hurting. I decided to pick up the bible and started to read it.

What I found was that the teachings of Jesus were so different than the normal life that I was used to, that it hooked me. There was like this spiritual force drawing me toward God, which I later found out was called The Holy Spirit.  And I struggled to follow God.  But some days, I still tried to fit in with others around me.   But when I was serious about following God, people thought I was different!

Do you know someone that is different in a good way?  It’s refreshing to be around them.  Do you know somebody who is different in an odd way?  Those who are just strange or annoying?  What I want to share is about being different in a God way.

Here’s what Jesus said, that captured my heart in Matthew 7:13-14,

“Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow is the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” (NIV)

Think about this; wide is the road which the majority of the people travel. Unfortunately, in the crowd, that’s where I often find comfort. I’ll think, “Look at all of the people doing what we are doing, going where we are going, living how we’re living; we’re normal!  We must be good because this is what the majority of the crowd is doing and the majority of the people are going.”

Unfortunately though, Jesus said, “Many (the normal) are on the road that leads to destruction.”

I discovered that if my life looks like everybody else’s life, if I’m doing what everyone else is doing that may not be a good thing.  I may be on the broad road that leads to destruction.  Which road are you on?  When you leave the normal road to get on the narrow road where the few are, the normal people will think you’re different.  As you follow Christ you will be different.

I want to invite you to follow the teachings of Jesus and lead a different life. Because even if we take the Bible aside and just look at this practically, wouldn’t you agree that normal is not working? Think about it, what is normal in your schedules today? Overwhelmed, rushed, stressed, panicked, never enough time for what’s truly important because we’re overwhelmed with the urgent and missing out on the quality.

What is normal when it comes to money today?  It’s the pursuit of material things which never makes us happy. Normal is broke, debt and financial fear.  Normal is fighting about money.

What’s normal when it comes to work? Working for a paycheck, doing something you don’t really like just to get by. Normal is feeling like there’s got to be something more but you just can’t quite find what it is.

What is normal in relationships?  Hopping from bed to bed with different people until you finally do get married. And then, seven years into marriage, since things aren’t going along well, normal for more than half of the people in our country today is divorce. Normal is not working.

If you really believe there is something different and better than the normal life where the majority of the people are traveling, you’ll have to leave the broad road and get onto the narrow road where people will call you different.  Like me you can decide to follow Jesus and live for him.  It’s different, but you will have what few have; peace, joy, security, a sense of fulfillment and an eternal destiny.  Will you join me?

Darrell

www.RidgeFellowship.com

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